Because of Evan McKenzie
by I'm-Reading
Summary: There was a reason Lily said yes to James. And his name was Evan McKenzie.


This time was different, she could tell. He wasn't leaning against the wall with a smug smirk. He didn't have that over confident cocky look about him. He looked nervous as he stood in front of her. His hands were clutched behind his back and he let out a nervous smile as he saw her watching him. His raven hair, which she always remembered being ridiculously ruffled, lay flat against his head. Well as flat as James Potter's hair could ever be.

He was waiting and it took Lily a moment to realize what for. He was waiting for her. She was expected to answer. And for the first time since she'd met him she felt like she might say yes. She didn't want to hex him, she didn't want to slap him, and she didn't want him to disappear of the face of the earth, as she so often did. Which was odd, because Lily Evans hated James Potter. She despised him. It wasn't a rumor whispered in the dark hallways. It wasn't even something people wondered about. It was a known fact.

But James Potter was different. He was still funny; he was still as handsome as he'd ever been. But he was different, he was mature, he listened to what people had to say, he focused on his school work. He had stopped making fun of people, he took the head duties seriously. He was more like Remus Lupin, than he was like Sirius Black. And for the first time Lily felt like he was someone she could love.

But then there was Evan, sweet Evan McKenzie. The poor boy. He had loved her, she knew that. But so did James. And she'd always thought she'd marry Evan. The sweet muggle boy, who'd been her best friend for years. Who'd taken the fact that she was a wizard in a stride and never stopped loving her. The boy who'd never abandoned her. The boy she'd been dating every year. The boy she'd cried over every night after she heard that he had died. The boy who had torn her heart out of her chest without even meaning too. The boy she still felt obligated too, even after he died. The boy that made her unsure if she could trust James not to die as he had. There was a war surrounding them, and she wasn't sure if she could give her heart away again. But thinking of him drew her into a memory of him.

_It was a hot, sticky summer Monday. A light breeze blew through a deserted playground. Too hot for the children to come out and play. But two teenagers were out, probably sixteen years old. Taking pleasure in the comfort of a large tree's shady branches. They were a boy in a girl. The girls red hair sprayed across the brown haired boy's chest. _

_"I'm leaving, Lily," he said softly in her ear._

_Lily lifted her head, shifting so she could look into his eyes. She frowned but remained silent. Waiting for what he would say next. Evan took a deep breath._

_"I'm going to live with my father in America."_

_He stopped waiting for her reaction. Lily's face fell and her green eyes filled with tears. She drew her arms around him, and looked the world like she was never going to let go. _

_"Why?" she mumbled into his chest. _

_"I'm not helping my mom," he said wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close, as if it was the last time he would do so. It was. _

_"She doesn't need me to be around her. She's having trouble caring for herself. Adding me in is a stretch."_

_"Take me with you," Lily said desperately._

_Evan laughed lightly._

_"You know I wish I could, Lils. But you're needed here. Maybe one day."_

_"I don't know if I can live without you."_

_"You'll move on," he said softly, "I'll always love you, Lily. But I'm not going to be here all the time and I need to know that you'll be happy even if it's not with me."_

_Lily looked up at him reading the sincerity in deep blue eyes. _

_"I'll try."_

_He held her tight and kissed her lightly on the lips._

_"That's all you can ask for. "_

The next day he was dead. Killed as he left for the airport. A drunk driver had hit him, the wounds he received from the crash were instantly fatal. Lily cried herself to sleep all year. James had wondered why she was always crying.

_"I need to know you'll be happy even if it's not with me. "_

Lily Evans smiled as she looked into the nervous face of James Potter,

"Yes."


End file.
